We Americans are funny. We will cook and serve foods we detest, because that's what you do on Thanksgiving. It doesn't matter what it tastes like. It's the spirt of the season. It's the rule.
In celebration of Thanksgiving icky foods, I've gathered a list of foods people love to hate at Thanksgiving. Ironically, these are some of my favorites. Or, that's what I tell the boys when I plop these on the table come turkey day.
Top Ten Worst Foods on the Thanksgiving Table
10. Sweet Potato Marshmallow Melt - The very worst is when the marshmallows are hidden. You take a big bite of sweet potato, and then . . . ick . . . there's that melty marshmallow.
9. Green Bean Casserole - I suspect people just say they hate green bean casserole with those dried, fried onion rings on top. The bowl is always empty, but still people talk junk about this one. Where does it go? Does it just evaporate? No. I think not.
8. Jell-o with Fruit - Jell-o is supposed to slide down like ice cream. When you add fruit (like especially fruit cocktail), then you have to chew Jell-o, and that's just WRONG. Even the dog won't eat this.
7. Cooked Carrots - I don't think carrots were meant to be cooked. That's why you put orange juice in there when you're boiling them. Then, you ruin your carrots and your orange juice.
6. Cranberry Sauce - You know that hunk of stuff in the can. You shake it out, and it still looks like the can complete with the can ridges. Oh yes. It's Thanksgiving when you have canned cranberry stuff.
5. Giblets - Boy, I was sure surprised the first time I found that bag of spare parts in the turkey - after I cooked it and put it on the table. These are supposed to be used to make your gravy and dressing. Just don't look in the pan when you're boiling the turkey neck. That's enough to scare anyone.
4. Dressing or Stuffing - This is a good way to get rid of the stale bread. Some of it is very good. Some of it is dreadful. Take a small portion first and proceed as indicated.
3. Fruitcake - You knew that one was coming. There are enough fruitcake jokes out there. I'll just let that one rest other than saying the birds won't eat it either. Toss some in the yard and see. Sad.
2. Pumpkin Pie - The idea is good. Sadly, most people don't get it right. The crust is white and soggy, and that't not a good thing.
1. Turkey - OK. I said it. Why do we need a giant bird that takes up the whole oven on the one day of the year we're trying to cook a ka-zillion other things? Then, it's turkey leftovers for days and days. No wonder no one wants another turkey for a whole year.
Mostly we smile and gobble up the Thanksgiving feast or pretend our plate is too full when the bowl gets passed with the worst of the holiday fare.
Kids, on the other hand, know what they know. This poor kid didn't think much of those carrots.
My oldest son still reacts like this to foods he hates. In fact, he threw up in his friend's hand in high school when the other boys put peas and mashed potatoes in the milk and shook it up. Just looking at that did him in. My son's buddy stuck his hand out for high five. My son tried to turn but threw up right in his hand. So, when he says pass on the Jell-o, I don't push it.
Now you have an excuse to break out the grill and make something everyone will love from Yes You Can Grill. But, then again, it's just not Thanksgiving without all the old classics.